Note: Whānau is the te reo Māori word for a family group. It also covers extended or chosen family and friends. For the purposes of these resources we use the term to refer to those closely connected to people with ADHD, whatever form that may take. 

See: whānau - Te Aka Māori Dictionary (maoridictionary.co.nz) 

If someone in your whānau has ADHD, life can be interesting.​ At ADHD New Zealand we've got your back with events, support groups and resources. 

Support groups

Our support groups page shares a number of ways parents, caregivers and whānau can connect in-person and online, and links to organisations and resources that can help. 

Support groups (adhd.org.nz) 

Events for parents, caregivers and whānau

ADHD New Zealand holds regular Ask an ADHD Coach online sessions aimed at parents, caregivers and whānau of children and teens with ADHD.

Our Every Day with ADHD for parents and caregivers courses, run by Tracey Rountree are designed to help better understand ADHD, it's impact on daily life, and the ways it can shape emotions, behaviour and relationships. Keep an eye on our Events page for details: 

Events (adhd.org.nz) 

Understanding and accepting 

While living with a loved one with ADHD is complex, it can be successfully and happily done. Managing everyone’s expectations, including our own, is key. This may require a multi-layered approach, tailored to the specific needs and ways of functioning in your whānau.

Life is bound to go better when everyone - whānau, teachers, youth workers and co-workers - has a better understanding of ADHD and becomes willing to engage with greater acceptance and wisdom. ADHD is not an excuse, it is a reason to approach the everyday, differently. 

On this page you can find information on how you can provide this support. 

Family and whānau counselling 

Counselling can play an important part in family dynamics, providing the counsellor has good knowledge of ADHD. Check this before starting. Siblings often struggle to cope with the challenges of living with someone who receives extra attention. They might also benefit from the support of ADHD knowledgeable counselling.

Parenting courses

Parenting courses can play an important role in supporting children with ADHD.

ADHD New Zealand offers it's own Every Day with ADHD parenting course run by Tracey Rountree. Keep an eye on our Events
page for the latest sessions.

We also recommend Jenny Tebbutt's online webinars

• Practical Strategies and Resources for Growing Great Children with Learning Difficulties and Differences, and

• Growing Great Children with Learning Difficulties and Differences.

Incredible years is widely available and free. For details see the Ministry of Education website or check out our supporting organisations.

Government support for families managing ADHD

​You may be eligible for various government support depending on your situation. Below are some of the available options. 

Help at school

If you have concerns about your child's progress at school, either learning or behaviourally, you can talk to the classroom teacher, the school’s Special Needs Co-ordinator (SENCO) or the principal.

Your child may be eligible for extra help in class or access to programmes or learning environments that support calm and focus.  They may also be allowed access to specialised tools and help for learning.

Individual Education Plan (IEP) 

Your child may be entitled to an Individual Education Plan (IEP). IEPs are developed in meetings with individuals closely linked to the student where personalised needs are identified and goals set. This provides an opportunity for coordination between whānau and school increasing the likelihood of success.  As parents, you may want to be clear on the responsibilities for all involved as well as when outcomes will be reviewed.

Resource Teacher: Learning and Behaviour (RTLB)

Your child might be referred to a Resource Teacher: Learning and Behaviour (RTLB). RTLBs are teachers with extra training to support with learning and behaviour. They can help in the classroom as well as provide direct teaching and strategies for learning and behaviour management.

Special Education Grant 

Each school receives a Special Education Grant (SEG) to support students with moderate levels of difficulty, however the school sets priorities to best meet these needs. For example, these funds can be used for teacher aides or other forms of support.​

For more information visit:  

Supporting your child if they need extra help with their learning (education.govt.nz) and Parents and caregivers (education.govt.nz) 

FAQs on children with ADHD at school​

Q: Teachers don’t seem to understand how ADHD can affect children. What can you do?​

​​​​​​​A: Not all teachers will understand ADHD well. In interactions with the teacher, try to stay calm, confident in your child’s good intentions and empathetic towards the teacher – they don’t know your child as well as you do. If your conversations are unproductive or further help is needed, it might pay to reach out to a Special Needs Coordinator (SENCO) or Resource Teacher: Learning and Behaviour (RTLB) at the school.

Q: Your child does well at school both academically and behaviourally but collapses emotionally when they get home. What can you do?
​
​​​​​​​A: It is common for children with ADHD to put extra effort into behaving appropriately at school, academically and socially. This will be exhausting.  Support your child to develop an after school routine that provides an appropriate 'brain break' including a healthy snack or spending time in nature. Time on devices is better left to when they are calmer.

Q: Stress and conflict develop at home after school when getting my children to complete homework. What can I do?​​​​​​​​

A:  Avoid allowing homework time to become a source of stress. Explore strategies for easing through homework challenges such as taking brief ‘brain breaks', providing healthy snacks and limiting screen time until after the work is done.

Resources and support 

Young people with ADHD - resources, connections and support for young people living with ADHD and their whānau 

Adults with ADHD - information about how ADHD presents in adulthood and link to our self-assessment tool 

Vlogs, blogs, and podcasts - a collection of resources to help you manage life, the universe and ADHD 

Healthcare directory - ADHD healthcare professionals throughout the country