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If someone in your family has ADHD, life can be interesting.
Interacting with someone who has ADHD can have benefits, but can also be complex and managing your, and their, expectations may require a multi-tiered approach tailored to the specific needs of that person.
Click on each heading or "+" to find out more.
Interacting with someone who has ADHD can have benefits, but can also be complex and managing your, and their, expectations may require a multi-tiered approach tailored to the specific needs of that person.
Click on each heading or "+" to find out more.
Understanding and accepting
ADHD can be very difficult for you, however, it's vital that everyone (your extended family, teachers, youth workers and co-workers) understands and knows what's expected of them.
You can all make a positive impact on someone living with ADHD by showing appreciation and acknowledgement of them.
You can all make a positive impact on someone living with ADHD by showing appreciation and acknowledgement of them.
Family counselling
This can play an important part in your family dynamics, providing the counsellor has good knowledge of ADHD. Check this before starting. Siblings often struggle to cope with the challenges of living with a brother or sister who receives extra attention.
Parenting courses
These can play an important role in managing your child with ADHD.
- ADHD NZ offer it's own Everyday with ADHD parenting course run by Tracey Rountree
- ADHD NZ supports Jenny Tebbutt's online webinars:
- Incredible Years is widely available and is free. For details see the Ministry of Education website or check out our supporting organisations.
Government support for families managing ADHD
You may be eligible for various government support depending on your situation. Some of these are (click on each heading or "+" to find out more):
Child Disability Allowance (WINZ)
Children who are under 17 years and have severe ADHD are entitled to this allowance.
This allowance does not depend on income or costs and helps those caring for children with a disability at home.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
This allowance does not depend on income or costs and helps those caring for children with a disability at home.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
Disability Allowance (WINZ)
Getting the allowance depends on your income, assets and costs.
This allowance can help with costs like regular visits to the doctor, hospital, medicines, extra clothes, food or travel.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
This allowance can help with costs like regular visits to the doctor, hospital, medicines, extra clothes, food or travel.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
Childcare Assistance (WINZ)
The level of Childcare Assistance support is based on your income and number of children you have.
It provides financial support for childcare and out-of-school care and includes Childcare Subsidy for pre-school children, Out-of-School Care and Recreation (OSCAR) subsidy for children aged 5 – 13 years.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
It provides financial support for childcare and out-of-school care and includes Childcare Subsidy for pre-school children, Out-of-School Care and Recreation (OSCAR) subsidy for children aged 5 – 13 years.
For details see the Work and Income New Zealand website or check out our supporting organisations.
Carer Support
Carer Support is funded by the Ministry of Health and is based on an assessment by a Needs Assessment Service Coordination (NASC) agency.
It offers the carer/support person a break by helping to pay for an alternative carer for an agreed number of days. Carer support days can also be used to pay for various after school and recreational programmes.
For details see the Ministry of Health website or check out our supporting organisations.
It offers the carer/support person a break by helping to pay for an alternative carer for an agreed number of days. Carer support days can also be used to pay for various after school and recreational programmes.
For details see the Ministry of Health website or check out our supporting organisations.
Help at school
If you're worried that your child is not progressing at school, either in learning or behaviour, then talk to the classroom teacher, the school’s Special Needs Co-ordinator (SENCO) or the principal.
Students with learning or behavioural difficulties may have access to the following assistance options:
You can ask for an Individual Education Plan (IEP) meeting.
Your child might be referred to a Resource Teacher: Learning & Behaviour (RTLB).
Each school receives a Special Education Grant (SEG) to support students with moderate levels of difficulty, however the school sets priorities to best meet these needs. This fund is used for teacher aides etc.
Various other services are available, though less common. For details see the Ministry of Education website or check out our supporting organisations.
Students with learning or behavioural difficulties may have access to the following assistance options:
- extra assistance
- adapted programmes or learning environments, and/or
- specialised equipment or materials.
You can ask for an Individual Education Plan (IEP) meeting.
- This is attended by all the people closely involved with the student to identify needs and set goals.
- It gives the school and home a chance to work together to form strategies and exchange information and gives the student a better chance of success.
- Make sure roles and responsibilities are allocated and a review date is set.
Your child might be referred to a Resource Teacher: Learning & Behaviour (RTLB).
- These teachers are specially trained and may work in just one school or across a group of schools.
- They might provide direct teaching or help the classroom teacher or aide with teaching strategies and behavioural management techniques.
Each school receives a Special Education Grant (SEG) to support students with moderate levels of difficulty, however the school sets priorities to best meet these needs. This fund is used for teacher aides etc.
Various other services are available, though less common. For details see the Ministry of Education website or check out our supporting organisations.
FAQS on children with ADHD at school
Q: Teachers don’t seem to understand how ADHD can affect children. What can you do?
A: You need to find a way to work with teachers to manage ADHD in the classroom.
One way to do this is to get an IEP (Individual Educational Plan) set up. At the IEP you and your support person/advocate will be able to identify, with the teachers, your mutual concerns and what can be done to accommodate your child’s needs.
The best possible plan is drawn up with everyone’s agreement to be reviewed at a later date.
Whatever you do, the sooner you do it the better it will be for everyone. The problem won’t go away if you do nothing.
A: You need to find a way to work with teachers to manage ADHD in the classroom.
One way to do this is to get an IEP (Individual Educational Plan) set up. At the IEP you and your support person/advocate will be able to identify, with the teachers, your mutual concerns and what can be done to accommodate your child’s needs.
The best possible plan is drawn up with everyone’s agreement to be reviewed at a later date.
Whatever you do, the sooner you do it the better it will be for everyone. The problem won’t go away if you do nothing.
Q: Your child seems OK at school but his behaviour changes when he gets home. Is this ‘normal’?
A: Yes it is ‘normal’ for you to experience this!
School life for someone with ADHD can be very stressful. Many are astute enough to know what is required of them ‘to get through the day’ without getting into too much trouble. Tension can build up at school by having to behave in a way that is not natural for them. By the end of the day, this tension can reach a tipping point, so when they get home their stress levels are extremely high. This may be what you're seeing.
A suggestion – some team sports or other exercise can be beneficial for relieving some of the stress.
A: Yes it is ‘normal’ for you to experience this!
School life for someone with ADHD can be very stressful. Many are astute enough to know what is required of them ‘to get through the day’ without getting into too much trouble. Tension can build up at school by having to behave in a way that is not natural for them. By the end of the day, this tension can reach a tipping point, so when they get home their stress levels are extremely high. This may be what you're seeing.
A suggestion – some team sports or other exercise can be beneficial for relieving some of the stress.
Q: Your family is really stressed out after each school day trying to get the required homework completed. What can you do?
A: Homework should never cause stress, cause family disharmony or disruption in the home.
Talk to the teacher and ask that if you make sure your child spends the required time on the homework but does not complete it in that time, that this not incur punishment.
Home-life is far more important than any homework will ever be.
A: Homework should never cause stress, cause family disharmony or disruption in the home.
Talk to the teacher and ask that if you make sure your child spends the required time on the homework but does not complete it in that time, that this not incur punishment.
Home-life is far more important than any homework will ever be.
