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We are in the process of updating this website's content to provide quality and reliable information for the ADHD community. This may mean links break from time to time as we work through. Thank you for your patience!  

​​​​​​​Families living with ADHD

If someone in your family has ADHD, life can be interesting.​ At ADHD New Zealand we've got your back with events, support groups and resources. 

Support groups

Our support groups page shares a number of ways parents and caregivers can connect in-person and online, and links to organisations and resources that can help. 

Support groups (adhd.org.nz) 

Events for parents and caregivers

ADHD New Zealand holds regular Ask an ADHD Coach online sessions aimed at parents and caregivers of children and teens with ADHD.

Our Every Day with ADHD for parents and caregivers courses, run by Tracey Rountree are designed to help better understand ADHD, it's impact on daily life, and the ways it can shape emotions, behaviour and relationships. Keep an eye on our Events page for details: 

Events (adhd.org.nz) 

Understanding and accepting 

Living with someone who has ADHD can have benefits, but can also be complex. Managing your, and their, expectations may require a multi-tiered approach tailored to their specific needs. 

It's vital that everyone (whānau, teachers, youth workers and co-workers) understands and knows what's expected of them. We can all make a positive impact for someone living with ADHD by showing appreciation and acknowledgement of them. 

On this page you can find information on how you can provide this support. 

Family counselling 

Counselling can play an important part in family dynamics, providing the counsellor has good knowledge of ADHD. Check this before starting. Siblings often struggle to cope with the challenges of living with someone who receives extra attention. 

Parenting courses

Parenting courses can play an important role in supporting your child with ADHD.

ADHD New Zealand offers it's own Every Day with ADHD parenting course run by Tracey Rountree. Keep an eye on our Events
page for the latest sessions.

We also recommend Jenny Tebbutt's online webinar

  • Practical Strategies and Resources for Growing Great Children with Learning Difficulties and Differences, and

  • Growing Great Children with Learning Difficulties and Differences.

Incredible years is widely available and free. For details see the Ministry of Education website or check out our supporting organisations.

Government support for families managing ADHD

​You may be eligible for various government support depending on your situation. Below are some of the available options. 

Child Disability Allowance (WINZ)

Children who are under 17 years and have severe ADHD are entitled to the Child Disability Allowance through Work and Income New Zealand (WINZ). 

This allowance does not depend on income or costs and helps those caring for children with a disability at home. ​

Visit Child Disability Allowance (workandincome.govt.nz) for details. 

Disability Allowance (WINZ)

The Disability Allowance is a weekly payment for people who have regular ongoing costs because of a disability - such as regular visits to the doctor, hospital, medicines, extra clothes, food or travel.

Getting this allowance depends on your income and assets. 

Visit Disability Allowance (workandincome.govt.nz) for details. 

Childcare Assistance (WINZ)

Childcare Assistance provides financial support for childcare and out-of-school care. It includes Childcare Subsidy for pre-school children, and Out-of-School Care and Recreation (OSCAR) subsidy for children aged 5 - 13 years, It is based on your income and how many children you have. 

Visit: Childcare (workandincome.govt.nz) for details. 

Carer Support (Health New Zealand)

Carer Support is funded by the Te Whatu Ora Health New Zealand and is based on an assessment by a Needs Assessment Service Coordination (NASC) agency. It pays for an alternative carer for an agreed number of days. Carer support days can also be used to pay for various after school and recreational programmes. ​

Visit: Carer Support Subsidy (info.health.nz) for details.

Help at school

If you're worried your child is not progressing at school, either in learning or behaviourally, you can talk to the classroom teacher, the school’s Special Needs Co-ordinator (SENCO) or the principal.

Students with learning or behavioural difficulties may have access to the following assistance options:

  • extra assistance

  • adapted programmes or learning environments, and/or

  • specialised equipment or materials.

You can ask for an Individual Education Plan (IEP) meeting.

  • This is attended by all the people closely involved with the student to identify needs and set goals.

  • It gives the school and home a chance to work together to form strategies and exchange information, and gives the student a better chance of success.

  • Make sure roles and responsibilities are allocated and a review date is set.

Your child might be referred to a Resource Teacher: Learning & Behaviour (RTLB).

  • These teachers are specially trained and may work in just one school or across a group of schools.

  • They might provide direct teaching, or help the classroom teacher or aide with strategies and behavioural management techniques.

Each school receives a Special Education Grant (SEG) to support students with moderate levels of difficulty, however the school sets priorities to best meet these needs. This fund is used for teacher aides etc.​ Various other services are available, though less common. Visit: 

Supporting your child if they need extra help with their learning (education.govt.nz) and Parents and caregivers (education.govt.nz) for more information. 

FAQs on children with ADHD at school​

Q: Teachers don’t seem to understand how ADHD can affect children. What can you do?​

​​​​​​​A: You need to find a way to work with teachers to manage ADHD in the classroom. One way to do this is to get an IEP (Individual Educational Plan) set up. At the IEP you and your support person/advocate will be able to identify, with the teachers, your mutual concerns and what can be done to accommodate your child’s needs.​

The best possible plan is drawn up with everyone’s agreement to be reviewed at a later date.​ Whatever you do, the sooner you do it the better it will be for everyone. The problem won’t go away if you do nothing.

Q: Your child seems okay at school but their behaviour changes when they gets home. Is this normal?
​
​​​​​​​A: Yes it is normal for you to experience this! School life for someone with ADHD can be very stressful. Many are astute enough to know what is required of them to get through the day without getting into too much trouble.

Tension can build up at school by having to behave in a way that is not natural for them. By the end of the day, this tension can reach a tipping point, so when they get home their stress levels are extremely high. This may be what you're seeing.  A suggestion – some team sports or other exercise can be beneficial for relieving some of the stress.

Q: Your family is really stressed out after each school day trying to get the required homework completed. What can you do?​​​​​​​​

A:  Homework should never cause stress, family disharmony or disruption in the home. 

Talk the teacher and ask that, if you make sure your child spends the required time on the homework but does not complete it, this does not incur punishment. ​Home-life is far more important than any homework will ever be.