How to manage work and your children on an hourly basis
Working from home sounds great, but there are probably many of you who are finding out the reality is actually quite different — especially if you're not used to it. Add your kids, who are taken out of their usual routine, and that gives you an unusually full plate. It takes discipline and a lot of organization to be able to manage this.
Is it really possible to work productively at home while still being present for your kids? What you're actually doing is two full-time jobs. To survive, you need to let go of you own sense of perfectionism and being exceedingly and radically realistic with yourself. In other words, go easy on yourself. Most of you will be resetting your reality.
Also check in with your parent friends with whom you can commiserate. But mostly, give yourself a break. Have some compassion for yourself and know that no one has experience juggling the range of things that you're now currently juggling. Forgive yourself and tell yourself, ‘I’m going to get some sleep and wake up tomorrow morning and do it basically good enough. It doesn’t have to be perfect — just good enough.”
To do this, and still be effective, look at setting yourself five goals per day. Realistically, this might include one or two things you really need to accomplish at work, one or two things you want your kids to accomplish, and one family or partner activity - even if it’s blobbing on the sofa for half an hour watching TV. Don’t expect to or try to do more, because you’ll get frustrated and even more stressed.
Communication is also vital. Communicate with your partners and employers and set realistic expectations (this might also include accepting that more screen time will be inevitable).
Communicating
If both you and your partner are at home then you can plan to work in shifts. This is helpful if you have small children that require more attention. Breaking it up into two- or four-hour shifts apiece can ensure that each partner has dedicated time to focus. But even then, be prepared to help out if things get tricky, especially if there are multiple children.
Communicating ahead of time with your partner can prevent fighting and stress during the day. It might help to sit down with your partner every evening and go through your schedules. Both of you should aim to block out an hour or two to get work done during regular business hours. Communicating when you each need this time, ahead of time, keeps things calm during the day.
Have a family meeting and explain to your children how work works. Let your kids know that you have certain tasks that you must accomplish, and you can’t take frequent breaks to help them. Explain that when the door to your office / bedroom / kitchen / dining room or whatever room you've dedicated to work from, is closed, they have to knock before they come in. And, if there’s a “do not disturb” sign on the door, that means they can’t knock on the door, slide a note under the door, or text you with any questions. Also, explain that once you’re done with whatever it is you’re doing, you’ll come out and check on them. But until that happens, they need to either wait for you or solve the problem themselves.
Now’s also the time to have a frank conversation with your boss. It's unlikely your boss won't understand, even if they don't have kids. Understand the expectations of your boss, and setting expectations on what you're able to accomplish can help minimise the stress of needing to get things done.
Your work
When you're working at home, with your kids present, you can't expect to work at your normal capacity - take your to-do list and cut it in half, then cut it in half again.
And even when you've done that you might still end up working some unconventional hours to get things done. You might be able to work if your children are napping, and then again in the evening once they've gone to bed.
Everyone is being forced to be more productive with the time available, which could help you figure out what truly needs to be done, or ways to work more productively with all the great technology we now have available. This will be even more helpful when things finally get back to some semblance of normality.
Schedule activities
Many kids are used to a structured school day. If their routine closely follows their school routine they should face minimal disruptions for when they return to the classroom.
Create a daily timetable with your children of what they should do when, including exercise, homework or reading time, creative time, snack times or fun time.
Free academic content is available at e-learning for kids or Learn at Home from Scholastic Books, which has daily projects and courses at a range of grade levels.
If you're looking for books, there is a program called Epic, which is like a “Netflix for books.” If a teacher or librarian invites you, you’ll get free access to e-books and audiobooks. Scribd has a similar program. Alternatively have a look on Twitter for your kids favourite authors. Many are doing daily or weekly activities online.
There are also tons of free art sites, like Skillshare and art stores with free videos.
Eventually, though, your kids might get bored. A great back-up is to have activity jar. While you could fill the jar with activities such as “clean your room,” that probably won’t go over very well. Consider things like Legos for building a fort. When your kids are bored, have them pull a slip from the jar and do the activity. You’ll need to set ground rules ahead of time (like, no matter what, you have to do the activity), but it’s a great way to keep kids occupied.
You could also provide a checklist of tasks for them to complete each day. Once the checklist is complete, reward your kids with a fun activity like playing a video game or some other form of screen time.
Other fun time can include setting up virtual play dates for your children. Think of friends, aunts, uncles, grandparents, babysitters, teachers. These people are amazing resources because they can talk, read, play games, sing, do dances, and much more.
Get fresh air and exercise
Don't dismiss simple activities. Growing up pre-iPads and mobiles we used to kick balls to each other, or play with a hacky sack or tag - there were endless options for keeping us entertained without screens.
If you can schedule outside or recess time for them you can focus on your work, they get tired out, and they get some vitamin D from the sun. A deck or a yard can serve as a play area, a snack area, a whatever area you need it to be at that particular time.
Reward good behaviour
Rewarding your kids for doing the things you ask of them will encourage them to do what you ask of them more often. Give them lots of praise, and thank them for their help. Spend some extra time with them and read a book or play a game. While your older children may not appreciate the gesture as much, they might appreciate extra screen or video game time.
Let’s all be honest - that most kids, regardless of their age, are probably going to be getting more screen time. Plopping your toddler or kindergartner in front of a Netflix cartoon or an iPad game while you get 45 minutes of critical work done is not the end of the world.
For teens though, the biggest battle might not be their school work but their social lives. So much of what is central to the teen experience is their social life In these times we can be thankful for the technology that's available. Your older children can play video games and talking and hollering with friends on Discord or FaceTime in his room.
Yes, these rewards sound remarkably similar to bribes. But working from home with kids sometimes means you do what you have to do to maintain harmony and keep the peace. Don’t worry. We won't tell ;)
Is it really possible to work productively at home while still being present for your kids? What you're actually doing is two full-time jobs. To survive, you need to let go of you own sense of perfectionism and being exceedingly and radically realistic with yourself. In other words, go easy on yourself. Most of you will be resetting your reality.
Also check in with your parent friends with whom you can commiserate. But mostly, give yourself a break. Have some compassion for yourself and know that no one has experience juggling the range of things that you're now currently juggling. Forgive yourself and tell yourself, ‘I’m going to get some sleep and wake up tomorrow morning and do it basically good enough. It doesn’t have to be perfect — just good enough.”
To do this, and still be effective, look at setting yourself five goals per day. Realistically, this might include one or two things you really need to accomplish at work, one or two things you want your kids to accomplish, and one family or partner activity - even if it’s blobbing on the sofa for half an hour watching TV. Don’t expect to or try to do more, because you’ll get frustrated and even more stressed.
Communication is also vital. Communicate with your partners and employers and set realistic expectations (this might also include accepting that more screen time will be inevitable).
Communicating
If both you and your partner are at home then you can plan to work in shifts. This is helpful if you have small children that require more attention. Breaking it up into two- or four-hour shifts apiece can ensure that each partner has dedicated time to focus. But even then, be prepared to help out if things get tricky, especially if there are multiple children.
Communicating ahead of time with your partner can prevent fighting and stress during the day. It might help to sit down with your partner every evening and go through your schedules. Both of you should aim to block out an hour or two to get work done during regular business hours. Communicating when you each need this time, ahead of time, keeps things calm during the day.
Have a family meeting and explain to your children how work works. Let your kids know that you have certain tasks that you must accomplish, and you can’t take frequent breaks to help them. Explain that when the door to your office / bedroom / kitchen / dining room or whatever room you've dedicated to work from, is closed, they have to knock before they come in. And, if there’s a “do not disturb” sign on the door, that means they can’t knock on the door, slide a note under the door, or text you with any questions. Also, explain that once you’re done with whatever it is you’re doing, you’ll come out and check on them. But until that happens, they need to either wait for you or solve the problem themselves.
Now’s also the time to have a frank conversation with your boss. It's unlikely your boss won't understand, even if they don't have kids. Understand the expectations of your boss, and setting expectations on what you're able to accomplish can help minimise the stress of needing to get things done.
Your work
When you're working at home, with your kids present, you can't expect to work at your normal capacity - take your to-do list and cut it in half, then cut it in half again.
And even when you've done that you might still end up working some unconventional hours to get things done. You might be able to work if your children are napping, and then again in the evening once they've gone to bed.
Everyone is being forced to be more productive with the time available, which could help you figure out what truly needs to be done, or ways to work more productively with all the great technology we now have available. This will be even more helpful when things finally get back to some semblance of normality.
Schedule activities
Many kids are used to a structured school day. If their routine closely follows their school routine they should face minimal disruptions for when they return to the classroom.
Create a daily timetable with your children of what they should do when, including exercise, homework or reading time, creative time, snack times or fun time.
Free academic content is available at e-learning for kids or Learn at Home from Scholastic Books, which has daily projects and courses at a range of grade levels.
If you're looking for books, there is a program called Epic, which is like a “Netflix for books.” If a teacher or librarian invites you, you’ll get free access to e-books and audiobooks. Scribd has a similar program. Alternatively have a look on Twitter for your kids favourite authors. Many are doing daily or weekly activities online.
There are also tons of free art sites, like Skillshare and art stores with free videos.
Eventually, though, your kids might get bored. A great back-up is to have activity jar. While you could fill the jar with activities such as “clean your room,” that probably won’t go over very well. Consider things like Legos for building a fort. When your kids are bored, have them pull a slip from the jar and do the activity. You’ll need to set ground rules ahead of time (like, no matter what, you have to do the activity), but it’s a great way to keep kids occupied.
You could also provide a checklist of tasks for them to complete each day. Once the checklist is complete, reward your kids with a fun activity like playing a video game or some other form of screen time.
Other fun time can include setting up virtual play dates for your children. Think of friends, aunts, uncles, grandparents, babysitters, teachers. These people are amazing resources because they can talk, read, play games, sing, do dances, and much more.
Get fresh air and exercise
Don't dismiss simple activities. Growing up pre-iPads and mobiles we used to kick balls to each other, or play with a hacky sack or tag - there were endless options for keeping us entertained without screens.
If you can schedule outside or recess time for them you can focus on your work, they get tired out, and they get some vitamin D from the sun. A deck or a yard can serve as a play area, a snack area, a whatever area you need it to be at that particular time.
Reward good behaviour
Rewarding your kids for doing the things you ask of them will encourage them to do what you ask of them more often. Give them lots of praise, and thank them for their help. Spend some extra time with them and read a book or play a game. While your older children may not appreciate the gesture as much, they might appreciate extra screen or video game time.
Let’s all be honest - that most kids, regardless of their age, are probably going to be getting more screen time. Plopping your toddler or kindergartner in front of a Netflix cartoon or an iPad game while you get 45 minutes of critical work done is not the end of the world.
For teens though, the biggest battle might not be their school work but their social lives. So much of what is central to the teen experience is their social life In these times we can be thankful for the technology that's available. Your older children can play video games and talking and hollering with friends on Discord or FaceTime in his room.
Yes, these rewards sound remarkably similar to bribes. But working from home with kids sometimes means you do what you have to do to maintain harmony and keep the peace. Don’t worry. We won't tell ;)
